Monster parents

Monster parents (Japanese: モンスターペアレント, Chinese: 怪獸家長) refers to parents who launch unreasonable requests or complaints to teachers, and give instructions that unfairly benefit their children. These requests are not usually part of the teacher's job. The phrase originated from Japan and subsequently gained widespread usage in Hong Kong.

Origins

The phrase "monster parent" was originally a Wasei-eigo term coined by Japanese educator Yōichi Mukōyama (ja:向山洋一) in 2007.^[1] It was subsequently made widely known in Asia by a TV drama also named Monster Parents in Japan, which was broadcast from 1 July 2008 to 9 September 2008.^[2] By 2011, the phrase had seen widespread usage in Hong Kong as well.^[3]

Hong Kong

Education system

Under the Hong Kong education system, most students are required to attend interviews that assess their academic and extracurricular achievements in order to study in their ideal schools, which means that most schools will select a group of genuinely outstanding interviewees to be their students. Therefore, parents tend to force their children to excel at different talents because they want to increase their skills and make it easier for them to get into their selected school.^[4]

Development

As most Hong Kong children under monster parenting are forced to follow tight schedules, they have little time to manage their daily life and routine. As a result, their parents will take care of their children in a highly protective way as they do not want their children suffer from any damage or get hurt. Some parents will even shirk children’s responsibility to others, for instance, teachers, tutors and other children in same age.

Examples

Due to the indulgence of monster parents, those children usually have a bad behavior and of a belief that they are right. Moreover, they are self-centered and arrogant. Those children are likely to put the blame on others rather than self reflecting and improving oneself.^[5] For example, when they encounter some difficulties or have argue with their classmates in school, they would simply ask their parents for help no matter who is wrong or right. This indicates that they do not know how to deal with those interpersonal relationship which is basic elements in life especially in the workplace.

Effects on children

Social effects

Monster parents tend to cosset their children by interfering their personal life in every way. Monster parents overly care for their children to an extreme degree and often end up developing them into narcissists.^[6] These children would find it difficult to get along and communicate with others in different social groups, as they are too self-contained. Children raised by monster parents can become selfish and may find it hard to accept ideas that oppose or differ from theirs. However, it is essential for children in their developmental process to channel new ideas and improve communication skills.

Psychological effects

Monster parents in Hong Kong focus harshly on their children's academic prospects. They arrange various and sometimes, superfluous extracurricular activities for their children, which may cause children pressure. Children have to handle workload from school and it may be too intense for them to deal with too many knowledge and skills learning. They would feel depressed and disappointed with themselves if they failed the expectations of their parents. This anxiety may not grow into those kids in the beginning but if they are constantly under high pressure, it may lead them to suicide.^[7]

Consequences

There are foreseeable influences caused by monster parenting style. It may affect children’s academic developments and their future careers as well. With the monster parenting style, it is believed that the parents may have extremely high expectations about their children’s academic achievements. Indeed, children may appear to start feeling the pressure when they start failing to reach the high hopes and expectations of their parents while academic stress arises.^[8] In generally, the lack of independence may influence on the children’s future career as there are no opportunity for them to practice and learn before entering workplaces. So much of how you parent is shaped by how you were parented.^[9] It is reasonable to assume that monster parenting style is a vicious circle, which is a long-term social issue. Parents wield enormous clout in the development of their children as they are the learning targets of them. Parenting patterns are passed down from generation to generation. Thus, excessively protective parenting style may influence more and more generation until there is an alternative parenting style to replace it.

See also

• Helicopter parent, a similar parenting style in the United States

References